Sunday, 17 February 2019

Desk Mess Is Good

I love to be surrounded by things that I like and my desk is a pretty good example of that. Although this first photo is a bit too many things, there's no space for me lol (=⌒▽⌒=) Every now and then I have a big tidy up and make a big clear space on my desk and then just let it fill back up as I work until it's not usable anymore and then I start the cycle again. I like it, it's a good system for me.

I do tidy up at the end of each day. These stickers and pens got put back in their places and mugs get taken downstairs but somehow there's always a few things that get left out.

I love ephemera and bits and bobs and I think that just means I will forever be surrounded by little things that make me feel cosy. One of the constants my whole life is my love for cutting up bits of paper and sticking them down somewhere else. I remember going to the library after school for my half hour of free internet and printing out pictures of my favourite bands, taking them home and pritt sticking them into diaries and notebooks. I think that's just how I want my surroundings to feel, like I've cut out all these things from the world and put them where I like them.

Saturday, 16 February 2019

Hearts, Rats and Gacha ~ Shop Update

Some new things are in my shop! These cute heart girls come in two colours and started life as a tiny doodle in my diary at a coffee shop. That sounds like such a normal thing but I actually don't go out much and going out for a drink is a bit of a treat. It reminded me that getting out of the house is actually really important for being creative. I know it's just a simple drawing but something felt different about the process. A change of environment just gets your brain working a bit differently. Being stuck in the house is a bit of an evil circle, I don't go out because I have no money but not going out is maybe holding me back in my work so how will I get money...

I had this gacha idea, doodled it out, worked it up and made the badges all in one day. It's fun to make something quickly without letting it drag on for ages, getting over-thought. These were so difficult to photograph, the colours just wouldn't photograph accurately, I'd get the text right and then the background would be wrong and on and on. I had trouble with the rat sticker photos on the same day, I think the light was just really blue or something? I always feel like my stuff is much better seen irl but how do you get that across in a photo? I will keep practising though!

And some rat stickers! I've wanted to make something with rats for a while but I think I let myself get intimidated by how much I love them and just couldn't get the drawings right but then it just suddenly clicked and I ended up with enough rats for two separate sticker packs and I'm really proud of them.

I'm having some ups and downs but generally I'm feeling pretty good about my work so far this year, I just want to keep making as many things as possible. Let myself do whatever pops into my head without worrying too much about whether it's what I should be making.

Thanks for being here and please check out my shop and remember sharing artist's work is super helpful even if you can't buy anything yourself ^-^

Here's a vlog from when I made the heart twin tails stickers.

Wednesday, 13 February 2019

A Sick Rat

February didn't start great and has so far just been super stressful and very tiring. Right at the start Sharky got really ill, fast. It was so awful, I thought he was going to die. He's still ill but he's so much better.
He was breathing really fast, his sides were sucked in and he'd stopped eating and drinking. His behaviour was strange too, he seemed confused and he basically refused to be in the cage, he spent a few days just sitting on our necks/shoulders.

So, back to the beginning. On Sunday evening I thought he seemed a bit off but wasn't sure because I'm super paranoid about them and sometimes think something is wrong but they're just asleep. On Monday morning it was obvious something was really wrong so we made an appointment at the vet. We saw the vet, got home and just knew something wasn't right. It felt like we knew rats better than her, it just felt wrong. It didn't feel like he'd really been seen and all she did was re-prescribe what was written on his file from last time he was in, we only got the anti-inflammatories because I asked for some. We had a lot of trouble getting Sharky to take his medicine and Will phoned the vet to ask if there was anything else that could be done for him, he was in such a bad way. She told us no, they don't do exotics. !  Thinking about it makes me so angry. She didn't tell us that she basically didn't know what she was doing and then tried to tell us they couldn't help us full stop.
Will went back on Tuesday and there was a different person on the desk and a different vet on duty and they told us the person we'd seen isn't trained for rodents, we never should have been given an appointment with her and booked us in with the other vet.
I can't understand why the first vet didn't just say "here's antibiotics to get you started but you should come back tomorrow and see someone that knows rats". I'm so mad. I'm really happy with our vets in general but this was awful.
Anyway, Tuesday we saw a decent vet and she checked him over so thoroughly and talked us through everything. She even gave him an injection of the anti-inflammatory to get us started and a bit of fluid because he wasn't drinking. She counted his breathing rate and told us to count it at home so we would know if he was getting worse and to come back if he did. She was just super helpful and we went home feeling much better. Sharky might still have been really ill but at least we knew we were doing everything we could for him.
By Wednesday we'd got him hooked on cucumber. We wanted to get him re-hydrated and he wouldn't drink but he loved cucumber. Then he started to perk up, he started drinking and eating and eventually spent more and more time back in the cage rather than hiding on us.

We're still having to syringe the antibiotics because the first few times we had to syringe it into his mouth because he wasn't eating and he got such a taste for it that he can smell it in anything we put it in and he refuses to eat it. We are managing to hide the anti-inflammatories now though so at least that's one less syringing he needs.
Syringing the medicine is so stressful. It took a few goes to get the hang of it (it's weird to shove something so much in his mouth) but he's also learning how to avoid it. Most of it is going in now but he does end up with a wet chin which he rubs all over the sofa first chance he gets. It's for his own good but I feel so sorry for him he must be so confused, why are we doing this horrible thing to him. He's such a good boy though, and aside from trying to spit it all back out he does really well at it.
We're just over a week into the two week course now and his behaviour is back to normal and his breathing has slowed down a bit. We're going to get him back into the vet soon to see how he actually is and what needs doing next. Hopefully not much, hopefully he's magically better. She talked of x-rays and I just don't even want to think about it.
And me, I'm really fucking tired lol. The stress is wearing me out, we're getting up earlier to give him his meds and staying up later to keep an eye on him so am tired and being so tired and stressed is making me all crazy negative and thinking bad things about myself and my work and then that stresses me out even more.
I'm actually not feeling as bad today, hopefully I can ride it out without too much damage. It's at that point where every tiny thing adds onto it and it just feels like everything is happening at once and can't we catch a break and oh my god the mushroom bag broke and there are mushrooms everywhere, has anything this bad ever happened before, how will I survive!!! And yeah, I'm tired lol.

Wednesday, 30 January 2019

What's On My Desk

I've been feeling very affected by grumpy, bigoted idiots lately and because I can't do anything about those people, being affected by it stresses me out which becomes a bit of an evil circle. I think in the fight against what is stupid in the world, an important thing is to be happy and fulfilled and truly ourselves as much as possible. And to do what you can to help other people achieve that too. Angry idiots always want to drag you down with them into their insecure, scared, ugly little worlds and surely one of the best things to do against that is to be your best self. I don't know, I just want to be happy and there's way too much that seems to not want that so screw that, I'm just gonna have a cosy time.

Anyway, here are some recent desk photos because they make me happy and so does how productive I'm feeling this week. The first photo is a little pack of stickers I made for Will. When I print stickers I try to fill all the gaps so as to not waste the paper and Will has a new phone case to decorate.
The above photo is from packing the first order of my new stickers, thank you ^-^

I've been wanting to make some dangly/plush/charm/soft toy things lately so I've started practising, here's a little bird friend.

And from this morning some new stickers I've been working on. I'm on a roll and it feels good ^-^

I hope you're doing good ^-^

Friday, 25 January 2019

Lots Of New Stickers ~ Shop Update

I spent the past just over a month working on a folder of drawings I wanted to make better and use and I spent the past week printing and cutting and photographing and editing and now there are new stickers in my shop ^-^
Please check them out. I split them into two groups so there's two listings where you can buy them one at a time and I also have a listing that is a pick n mix for you to choose your favourites to make a set of 6 stickers (for the price of 5).
I'm really pleased with how they turned out and it was a lot of work so I hope you like them too.

Here are some work in progress shots because desk/floor mess is one of my favourite things.

I still can't quite believe I finally have a guillotine. I hadn't had access to one since uni and it was sorely missed. I don't think I'd have thought to make these square stickers without it. (and if I had, it would have been a lot more difficult and wonky lol)

I'd been saving the front of my 2019 planner for once I'd made these so that I had some in use type photos and it felt good to finally cover it.

Thanks for looking to the end. After such a long time working on nothing but digital drawings, making some actual physical things again was so satisfying and I am so ready to make even more new things for my shop. I have so many ideas ^-^

Wednesday, 23 January 2019

Mechanical Circus

There's been an exhibition on at The Forum called Mechanical Circus since early December and when I saw it announced I was like "ooo we have to make sure we go to that" so fast forward to the last week it's on in January and we finally went. I mean, at least we actually went to this. We either go to things last second or we just miss them entirely. Because we're smart.

It was really fun, they had photo spots and lots of automata, automatons?, moving on their own dudes and there were zoetropes and cool magic, distorted, mirror pictures. I had a good time.

Then we popped into Pret for hot drinks and snacks. They have a matcha latte now! I love a matcha latte, I have no knowledge of how a "good" one should be but the green makes me happy and so does being full of warm, gentle, tea-y milk. I am a cosy egg.

I'll add this video here too because it has some moving footage from the exhibit from about 2:12 :)

Thursday, 17 January 2019

Diary Scans

For a while I made art journals and filmed flip through videos but lost interest in that. I made a couple of zines from bits in my diary but stopped halfway through making the third because I wasn't having fun putting it together but also I'd realised I'd turned my diary into work. Unintentionally it had become a place I knew I was going to try and make a zine out of and it wasn't really a diary anymore. I didn't have a private space. So I made the conscious decision to have a diary that I would keep entirely private so I could do whatever I want in it and it just doesn't matter at all and it's the best. I sometimes do something in my diary that I want to share but sharing the things isn't on my mind when I'm in there. It's nice to write and draw and cut and stick and know it's just for me.